Change The Only Thing You Can – Your Mind
Albert Einstein is attributed with saying, “If the facts don’t fit the theory, change the facts.” I love this quote because it encourages the examination of facts, which may appear to be unchangeable but which in fact can be incorrect.
Too many people shy away from change.
They actually dislike the very word. You can hear the fear in the way so many people express their dislike of change. “I don’t want to change.” “Why should I change?” “Why doesn’t everyone else change to accommodate me?” “If I change, then I will be out of my comfort zone.” “Why change something that isn’t broken?”
But here’s the rubbing point. Asking or expecting someone else to change in order to make their behavior fit the so-called “facts” of your life or to make you feel more comfortable is like expecting the sun not to rise. It’s a pointless request and an exercise in futility.
There is only one place where real change can occur. Within one’s own mind. Change comes from within. Change is something we do with and for ourselves. If you’ve ever attempted to change a habit, a way of thinking or being, you know what a difficult task it can be. We must change our mind before anything else can change. We have to change the way we see things. No one else can change our behavior or thinking for us. It is a very personal task. With that, you can see why it is really useless to ask, expect or anticipate others to change their ways just because we want them to.
Real Change is An Inside Job
So, let’s focus on how to change oneself. The first question to consider is, “why would you want to change yourself?” Typically the only answer worth entertaining is that your behavior results in outcomes that you don’t like.
Have you ever had a conversation with a person and you really wanted to change his or her mind about something? You try your best to convince them that your point of view is right and theirs is wrong! You wonder why they can’t see it your way. You don’t understand why they don’t realize just how foolish their ideas are.
Change is really simple but we complicate it because we think everyone else needs to change, not us. Stop, take a breath and read that again. Change really is simple. If you want a different end result, you need to make a change.
If you want to convince someone you are right and they are looking at you like you have three eyes stop and look within. Ask yourself why you want to convince anyone of anything. If someone cannot see your point of view for whatever reason, if someone is doing something that you don’t like, if someone or something is not what you expected, ask yourself why it is so upsetting to you. Look at your behavior – what you are doing, thinking, saying. Take the blame off others and look at your actions and make the necessary changes and adjustments to achieve the end result you so desire.
Cause and Effect
Your actions cause an end result or an effect. If you don’t like the effects you are seeing in your life examine your continuous thoughts and change the causes. Change the thoughts and actions that lead to those effects. Change the way you think about what’s happening in your life. Take responsibility for your thoughts and actions. Don’t blame someone else for making your life the way it is.
If you want a particular effect, but aren’t getting it, then change the cause. You are the only one who can do that. If the facts don’t fit the theory, in other words, the end result of the facts is not the theory then the facts are incorrect and must change.